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Tallahassee Parents,

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Competition has changed quite a bit over the last few decades. Many sports present all players a trophy for participation regardless of their performance. Although we all like acknowledgment, these actions can take away the many benefits of organized competition.

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A confident person often stems from someone who has learned from their mistakes, put in a lot of hard work and sweat equity and has received success that can be measured in improved results in business, health or even relationships.

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Does this confidence come easily, usually not. Behind the curtain this journey most likely involved disappointment, fear, frustration and many emotions others might see as negative. However, remember in math two negatives do make a positive.

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The road to a more confident person is not an easy one, however with a lot of positive encouragement anyone may improve their confidence.

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What does this involve if you are a parent wanting to improve your child’s confidence?

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First, you have to play the game without an exit strategy. Quitting cannot be an option. It only reinforces the. same behavior. Childhood is when a lot of our behaviors and attitudes are formed and yes they can be changed when your an adult, however it takes a lot more work.

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We as parents need to remind ourselves that negative experiences are just as important to our mental growth as the positive ones. The important thing is how you handle them and what you learn from those experiences.

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As a martial arts professional teaching 1000’s of children for over 25 years, I encourage parents to re-evaluate how you look competitions and extra curricular activities. Set goals “with” your child not “for” your child when you start a new activity. Once that goal is about to be met, set a new one and work toward that.

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For example, if a child is working toward their Black Belt and getting close; do take that as a stopping point, but an opportunity to set a new goal of say 2nd degree. Keep the momentum going and add a little more challenge each time.

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With purpose comes direction, with direction comes drive. DO NOT RELY ON MOTIVATION, it comes and goes too quickly and cannot be relied on.

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Good luck on your new journey and let us know if we can help!

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If you are interested in contacting Brad Fantle for speaking engagements you may reach him by email at tigerrocktally@gmail.com. He is a 7th Degree Black Belt with Tiger Rock Martial Arts, has 25 years experience working with children and teaching self-defense, an ADHD Coach and has a BA in Sports & Fitness from the University of Alabama

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